Real life critical fumbles – Game prep

No matter how many adventures you’ve been on, no matter how many foes you have defeated and no matter how many villages you have saved, everyone has moments when they’re not fully paying attention or when they’re a little too hung over or when they are simply having a bad day.
 
That’s why fumbles exist, because no one is always at their best. In gaming terms fumbles can happen at any time and lead to you injuring yourself, injuring your friends or aiding your enemies, but fumbling in real life can be no less disastrous and fumbling game prep can have just as serious consequences for your game.
 
Game prep real life critical fumbles:
 

01 – 25 You decide to take your game into a completely unexpected direction. Your players don’t like it. Oh well. Nothing ventured, nothing gained
26 – 30 Your dog eats your notes – 10 to initiative
31 – 40 Accidentally rub chilli oil in your eyes after cooking making it very difficult to read your notes – perception -10
41 – 50 Some of the snacks have exploded over your notes and books – 10 to initiative, – 5 to perception and -5 to leadership
51 – 60 You have been up all night worrying about the campaign and how it will be received by your players. You’re pretty tired – 20 to initiative, – 5 to memory
61 – 65 An image you were going to use as a portrait of an orcish NPC bares a striking resemblance to one of your new players – Lose two rounds as you quickly try to find a new image.
66 Almost all of your clothes are lost in a terrible laundry accident and you are forced to GM in a swimsuit – 30 to leadership
67 – 70 You forget that one of your players is lactose intolerant and all the snacks are cheese based – Lose ten rounds as they purposefully try to derail your plans
71 – 80 You stupidly keep your gaming books on the top shelf. As you get them down some fall on your head – 20 hits
81 – 85 Whilst painting some miniatures ready for your game you mistake the methelated spirits you are using to clean your brush for water – 20 hits, resistance roll against poison
86 – 90 You accidentally give the players the wrong address and telephone number. Spend the night alone wondering where they are and why they haven’t called. They never speak to you again
91 – 95 You have a great idea and rush to your desk to write it up. You are writing with such excitement that your pen slips and you stab yourself in the leg. – B puncture critical, 10 hits
96 – 99 You go to great lengths to create ‘love letters’ that your players will find during next week’s game. Your significant other finds them and believes that you mean to send them to someone else – Lose 20 rounds as you explain that they are props for the game
100 One of the secret demonic incantations that you ‘made up’ for the game turns out to be genuine. A world-destroying fire demon bursts into existence and within moments has all but destroyed the Earth. As everything that you have ever known or loved slides into non-existence, one of your less perceptive players comments “Wow! It’s so realistic” – Death