Real life critical fumbles – First dates

No matter how many adventures you’ve been on, no matter how many foes you have defeated and no matter how many villages you have saved, everyone has moments when they’re not fully paying attention or when they’re a little too hung over or when they are simply having a bad day. That’s why fumbles exist, because no one is always at their best. In gaming terms fumbles can happen at any time and lead to you injuring yourself, injuring your friends or aiding your enemies, but fumbling in real life can be no less disastrous and it seems that first dates are rife with fumbles.
First date real life critical fumbles:

01 – 25 Your date thinks that Rolemaster is over-complicated and unfun. They’re obviously not the right person for you. You leave without another word. Better luck next time
26 – 30 Your date never arrives. Spend 10 rounds waiting for them before giving up and going home to order a takeaway and have a bit of a cry
31 – 40 Accidentally call your date by your ex’s name -10 to all charm type skills
41 – 50 Whilst cutting your food a stray pea flies up from the plate and hits you in the eye. -10 to all perception checks and -10 to all charm skills
51 – 60 In an attempt to calm yourself down, you have a bit too much to drink -10 to initiative, -10 to perception, -10 to all charm type skills
61 – 65 An ex is in the same restaurant as you and, upon noticing you on a date, they spend the entire time talking very loudly about how awful you are – 25 to all charm type skills
66 Though you have a wonderful time, you just can’t stop talking in rhyme. -30 to all charm skills
67 – 70 Your blind date turns out to be the celebrity that you idolise. Your brain simply can’t cope -20 inititative, -20 perception, your Re is now at -10
71 – 80 Your blind date is your ex. Before you know what has happened they have punched you in the face and disappeared. 10 hits, prone for 3 rounds
81 – 85 In the process of cheersing to a good night you smash your glass in your hand -15 hits and an A slash critical
86 – 90 You are nervous. Your hands are shaking so much that you lose control of your knife, burrying it deep into your leg. 25 hit points and a B puncture critical
91 – 95 Your date is incredibly nervous and drinks too much in an attempt to calm themselves. Without warning they belch. The fumes ignite on the candles between you and you’re hit square in the face with a small fire ball – 30 hits, C heat critical
96 – 99 On your way back from the toilet you trip over an invisible dead turtle and fall face first into the table covering your date and yourself with your meals. They do not see the funny side and leave immediately – 30 hits, stunned for 5 rounds, A impact critical, dinner is on you
100 Your date goes really well and you end up going back to theirs. Unfortunately the second you get inside the door you are set upon by their family. They explain that they are in a demonic cult and require a human sacrifice. As you are led away to the altar, you can’t help but think that this is still isn’t the worst date you’ve ever been on. Death in 2 rounds.